It's a bad day. A really bad, bad day.
Last night our family went to a meeting. After the meeting there were refreshments: fruit, cake, cookies, punch, water. I watched Shawn eat his little plate of goodies and I was tempted. So I told him that I would just go look at the food table. Of course I ended up coming back with some of the fruit and a few non-GAPS treats. When the meeting wrapped up, the ladies started cleaning up and asked if anyone wanted to take any of the extra refreshments home. I grabbed a small plate for Shawn to take into work with him today.
I woke up this morning after Shawn had already left for work. Do you know what he did??? He left three of the cookies sitting on the kitchen counter! He actually left some of those things home for me to eat. So I ate them...all of them. I dunked those chocolate chip cookies in my coffee this morning and I scarfed it all down eagerly. I enjoyed it. They tasted so good. I miss cookies.
Now I hurt. My head is absolutely throbbing. I have no energy. I do not want to cook. I do not want to clean. I do not want ANY noise. I have no patience. I feel like I am barely functioning through a mental fog. My vision is literally a bit foggy too. I also feel engorged today (which is not normal) and David isn't nursing well. Apparently he doesn't care for cookie-infected milk.
Was it the grain from the cookies..or the sugar...or the artificial additives? I don't have a clue what exactly in the cookies is bothering me, but it has hit me hard. What's even worse is that I KNEW that I would be paying for giving into the cookie temptation, but I did it anyway.
I don't know if this post will do any good for others on GAPS, but it is something I need to go back and read each time I'm faced with temptation. Cheating on GAPS makes me hurt. It's not worth it.
This post is linked up to Real Food Wednesday with Kelly the Kitchen Kop.